People.

Misanthropic. Adjective.
Believing the worst of human nature and motives; having a sneering disbelief in e.g. selflessness of others [syn: cynical]

i don't necessarily fall under this category, but i'm a lot closer to it than most people that i know. and that's a good thing. my friends are intelligent, wise and silly, my family is loving and accepting of any new things i undertake, and even the casual acquaintences i have and develop are positive and sincere.

so, why then, should a simple, Gen-X post-slacker have a general mistrust of people? i can't say for sure. i poke fun at the normals. my life really hasn't been difficult, or with obstacles that i cannot move or simply move around. i enjoy life. i breathe deeply when it rains. i grow peppers. i listen to, record, and play music. i watch with scientific detachment as my hair falls out. i can make myself laugh at my own (and others') idiocy. i have a good life. i take moments to stare at the stars, appreciate how rare we must be in the cosmic scheme, and appreciate that i'm alive and have loved ones and friends around me.

i do know that i don't like scrutiny. maybe it's this flavor-filled little touch of paranoia that keeps me from trusting people. tonight i had to turn down a request from the fabulous girlfriend to attend a current pop-culture phenom film with her friends and her son. not because i had anything going on that couldn't be postponed, but because i cannot stand social situations that put me in close proximity to the public at large. the irritation i would have at those around me would far outweigh any joy i would receive from the film, and to a lesser extent, being with those that i love. it's something that's plagued me for most of my life. i did my best to politely decline, and hoped that i could make it up to the crew at a later point. i don't like parties or crowds. loud, obnoxious, emotional geocentrists fill the Hell which i'll probably fry in someday for my thought crimes and religious heresy. i can't tolerate knuckle-dragging mouth-breathers who shlep through their life without giving any thought to who and where they are, and so i avoid them.

the concept of the precious gift of being alive (i won't address god's church here, maybe i'll offend you, dear reader, on this subject later) seems to be wasted on the vast majority of people, at least in the red state in which i live. this makes my brow furrow and my teeth grind. idiots who go through their lives without having a sense of community, without skimming the topic of being part of the whole, and finally and most importantly, view themselves as the exact and literal center of the universe seem to be keeping me from socially interacting more than i have. i've always been this way.

with this little insight, i'll leave you, dear reader, to ponder my psychic backlash with a short blurb on heliocentrism.